May 19, 2001

In the ongoing effort to try and prove that I am my own person, and that my world does not revolve around Ethan, I decided to hit Matt's party with Ashley.  Just us chickies.  No boyfriends allowed.  I mean, somewhere I made the statement that I needed to give him room.  To give him space.  And it feels like I see him every single day. 

It's also an attempt to prove to Ethan that yes, oh I have things to do too.  Oh yes I do.  You're not the only one who has a group of friends that I never see.  I have friends I never see!  Since I'm spending all my time with Ethan.  Ooooh, I just hate that type of chick.  The type that gets a boyfriend and disappears until two years later, when he dumps her, and she shows up all crying and sobbing about how much she misses him.  Okay, that's projecting a little too far in the future, but that is a really bad realization.  I'm turning into that type of chick.  Never.  I will NEVER be that type of chick.

That's our mandate for the night.  "We are not that type of chick. Okay, maybe you are.  But I'm not!"  Ashley yells as we're driving down the 405.  WHAT!?  I would hit her, except I'm driving.  I am NOT that type of chick. Oh no, I'm not, oh no, I'm not.

We get to Matt's place, and everyone's there who I haven't seen in forever.  Matt, Theo, Scott, Beth, Amy Yell, Debbie, Ian, Jeff, Melissa, plus a gazillion other people.  Theo instantly gives me shit "What's it been, a month?  Thought you died or something."  AAAAHHHH!!  I am NOT that type of chick.  I escape to the kitchen.  I am NOT that type of chick.  I'm not.  I'm here, aren't I?  He's not here, is he?  I didn't bring him, did I?  I can go places without him.  I can.  I am.  Shut up.

And as I fume in the fridge, I decide to make a bet with Ash.  If I win, I'll get her back with that I'm That Type Of Chick comment.  I go up to Ash, "I bet you can't go through the whole party without drinking."